Dear Bluffton University Community,
As many of you may already be aware, on April 12, 2018, a drawing of the Confederate flag on the moon with the inscription, “The Confederacy will Rise Again,” was drawn on the sidewalk by the Bluffton basketball courts.
With much regret, I admit that I am responsible for this drawing, and I hold a lot of pain in my heart for the people I have hurt by it. As a former ministry assistant and spiritual leader on campus, my heart aches for the pain I have inadvertently caused to many members of our campus and community. My actions did not represent the type of welcoming and supportive community that the Campus Ministries team seeks to help nurture at Bluffton.
With this being said, I never possessed the mindset or intent to purposely attack underrepresented students on campus by my drawing. I never would have done what I did if I knew that I would’ve hurt people in the process because that is not the kind of person I am, or the life that I strive to live. From my perspective, I was trying to make a small joke about the dates of events not lining up; however this does not mean that my actions were justified. I have upset and offended many people, and I take responsibility for my actions and unawareness of the social climate we live in today.
My own temperament has filled me with guilt and sorrow, especially when I realized that I had upset others and let them down. Due to the fact that I have harmed many, I am currently undergoing and adhering to specific procedures in order to make amends for my wrongdoing.
I have talked with many of the university’s administrative leaders, and I will be in their hands as I go through the Restorative Justice Process. Through this process, I will have the chance to serve those that I have hurt by meeting with them to discuss what I did, how it affected them, and what I can do to help them recover from any emotional pain that I caused. Not only will I be meeting with those that I have hurt, but I will also be serving the community in any way that I can.
Furthermore, I will be researching more on the history of the Confederate flag and the way that it relates to slavery, oppression and inequality through a series of essays. In addition, this summer, I will be given a guided tour at the Underground Railroad Museum in order to learn more about slavery and racism. I thank God for these new learning opportunities because they will allow me to see perspectives I have not had the opportunity to see before.
Lastly, separately from the university, I have sought the guidance of a local pastor from my hometown who is a certified peace-maker/certified biblical counselor, and I will meet with him throughout the duration of the summer to discuss ways in which I can grow my faith and help others through learning from my mistakes.
Again, I cannot express the amount of regret that I bear from hurting those that I was supposed to help grow and prosper. Those that I have hurt did not deserve the affliction that has resulted from my actions, and I have also met with representatives from those groups as well.
After drawing what I did, I completely lost my appetite and became very weak because I knew the amount of severe pain and discomfort I had caused to all of the students on campus. As a follower of Jesus, I have sought the forgiveness that I have been seeking from God, and I have received forgiveness and purification. I am now reaching out to the community and sharing the sorrow and the hurt that I, along with many others, am feeling from what I’ve caused.
I ask for your forgiveness and to allow God to judge where my heart may be in this whole situation. I wish to see healing happen on campus and a rise in all of our faiths as we focus our eyes on Christ while living in this fallen world. I am taking the next steps to become more educated in this matter so I can prevent doing something like this again. I ask for your prayers as I work in becoming a better person coming out of this process. My mind continues to be renewed every day by Christ, and every morning God’s mercies are made new.
Again with much regret, I admit that I am responsible for this drawing and apologize for the trauma and pain that I have caused for those on campus.
Sincerely,
Bailey Hartle
